My letter to University freshers

By Henix Obuchunju

Dear readers am sorry this time around am late with my monthly talk but this is what I got for you concerning the incoming “babies” in our universities and colleges.

Forget about the babies peeing and pooing in beds, these are small boys and girls in adolescent hegemony. Dear freshers…… What if you became more careful with your life now that you have joined university? a place some of your village mates heard of while in primary school.

Mark, you they ‘graduated’ in class six and the whole village still celebrates their achievements. What if you remain humble as you were during the first week in campus? My friend this is a university, in simple language where the spirit of comrades’ power may reduce you to a mere village spokesperson if you aren’t careful. What if you went back to your room and thought of how our universities would still be running without your presence? Picture this, you are barely one month old and all the watchmen know you as a troublemaker.

Anyway, Thank God your village is at peace now that your parents lied that you got a job abroad. Ladies!!!! What if you became brilliant and stop getting attracted to these fat cats around in the name of sponsors? ooh sweetheart, this “quacks” are also competing with us for this free Wi-Fi (remember it is not even strong/stable). They will use, reuse and finally reduce you to the size of that graduation certificate you will receive at the end of four years after participating in horizontal acrobats with them.

If reports going around are to be believed, then I suggest the management of different universities and colleges to issue part of first years with graduation certificates in order for them to “left” early. reason? They are behaving more maturely than the elders around.

Am told some ladies in a well-known university in south Nyanza have participated in more than three “amorous congresses” with different men by now. Are these not a perfect epitome of cancer survivors? These are the kind of ladies when the phrase MAFISI TIBIM is voiced, she replies “guess what, that’s my second name!!!!” Hey you first-year boys, we know your systems and weapons of mass procreation are working on a Tip-Top condition.

But don’t you realize the increasing cases of HIV/AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases infections? Leave alone pregnancy. am told some men fear pregnancy than they do to a jail term. ………

I know the late founding academicians of this great nation must be rioting in their graves the moment they notice the only administrator some first years know is a WhatsApp group administrator.my friend set your goals this early, izo zingine wachia goalkeeper (the rest leave to the goalkeepers).

It’s simple let those vocal cords that irritate us daily on different corridors vibrate on scholarly paper alone. Remember you found many here and still you will leave them here!!!!

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